So the last week has been absolutely great but it has been filled with little moments of anger, stress, sandness, etc. and it's been slowly mounting up and last night I was enjoying some downtime and just getting myself to feel better when Aurore, who was waching tv, said Jane can you set the table please? And I did but I was really mad because I've done it everyday this week without being asked and I need a minute to just veg and zone out to recuperate and she just doesn't seem to see what most people can see sometimes. Long story short I started to cry because I felt like shit (after I set the table) and Aurore got so worried then and was like Jane don't cry please don't cry and then she did something stupid (which I can't remember at all) and I started laughing and crying and it was a sight to see. I honestly feel the pressure mounting as I hit today, the one month mark and it takes longer and longer now to bring myself a happy place and my mood has been out of control, happy one minute and sad or angry the next. So, I am in retarded English level one on the computer and I am dying of computer boredom!!!! I am also feeling like I want the package that my mom sent me to come because here Emma is talking about a second package and the first one for me, that hasn't even arrived, is leaving me in tears (just last night) and making me all stressed out. Which is not good because the whole purpose of the package is to make me feel better and to give me a little piece of my home. And so I shall leave you know and go and enjoy my recess before I relearn all about Hitler (when she says it it sounds like éclair, yumm!!!) and World War Two in History class before going home and praying to god that the package has arrived. 29/30 days until Morocco (give or take!!) and 55 days until Canada!! I promise it's not me counting, its the Canadian who is sitting next to me.
A feeling blah Jane. <333
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4 comments:
Hey Jane,
I know what you mean exactly, except my little emotions mount up faster so don't worry. If this is your first meltdown and it's already been a month that means that if they come again, you wont be getting more than 2!! Don't worry, the package will come super soon and once it does, email me or call if you need to and tell me all about what's in it. If you really need to, you can call me. But I know it's hard and I think it'd be better for you and me if it was just by email or msn, I love you tons! Email me!
Hi Jane, this is Gama.
I am finally back on your Blog, thanks to your Mom. I agree with Emma, if this is your first melt-down,so far from home, you are truly doing well.Better than I would have at your age (or maybe even my age).
By the personal handsome photos you are sharing, I will be very sad
if you cover your face when I next bring out my antquated camera. You are turning into a very skilled photographer. Keep it up.
Grandpa and I are doing great, and looking forward to both of you being home.
Keep Blogging!
Love you lots
Gama
Hi Jane, Gama again.
I finally did catch-up.
Read them all.
You are a great, great, great Blogger.
I`ll not lose you again.
Love, Love, Love
Gama
Hey Jane.
1 day is fantastic, you feel amazing - dancing, having a blast... and the next day all falls apart. Your package will come from mamma - she's great at those parcels and you will have a piece of home as you so eloquently said. I shall not have a chance to read and share your life - I am at your House for another art show. Have the best 10 days.
I shall look forward to seeing what you have been up to when I get back.
Love
Auntie Sue
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