My brain is hanging upside down

So I wrote the other post in the library while I waited a sad and long two hours for the train to come. I waited for one hour in the library and then another at the train station, sitting on the ground in between the passing trains and drawing faces with my sharpie (all of them half sad and half happy if you're interested) and making my face impassive and uninterested as a creepy old men winked and laughed and smoked and shouted unintelligable things at me, god, remind me to never sit for an hour outside of the train station!!!!
I am feeling better, although with A, not so much. She is being a pain, a lound shreaky computer hogging pain and we are rarely speaking. We acknowledge but it is a painful, you're a chore that I must continually do kind of acknowladgement, where does the good go? I am okay with that though, suprisingly, I have made plans with my amigas canadian and have plans almost for every single weekend until I leave and I have lots of energy to throw into homework, email, nice people at school, blogs and keeping myself in a polite, not distant, happy, cheery, thankful mood (when there are people around, on my own......).
Today I watched S21 a documentary about the Red Khmer, which I had never heard of but was interesting and brutal -quite like the holocaust. I didn't understand most of it but the Geo teacher was only too happy to help, she loves me, in the most annoying of ways. I came home today and dug up a story about a Lesbian who is rethinking her Lesbianninity (??) and is setting gay rights back in Georgia by a lot, for my news presentation in English class -in French- demain. Fun fun fun.....Afterwards I was about to go outside when Alix pulled me back in and said you have to stay inside and I said why and she said because I told Inès you couldn't play because you had a lot of work. The story behind that is once Inès (the six year old neighbour) came over to meet me and wound up being taught how to play rummy and now she annoyingly comes over every day and stays for hours requiring constant chatter and hanging off my shoulder until I want to hang....not in a good way. And so instead of playing with Inès all evening I got to be quiet and think about life and France and everything and the diet that I must start (not a rreall diet though) and also to reflect on how I left Canada five weeks ago and the inevitable thought that came to me being a previous two month exchanger (if I had only done the two month it would be half over now!!!!) God, I hate my brain.
I shall leave you now and go read my uber good book that my mommy sent me - thank god its long or it would already be over - and reflect about how much Canadian math I shall do tomorrow!!! God aint life a pain sometimes!!!
I love you all very much, I swear I don't just say it out of habit, three months in France and all I can think of is the people I love who are all snuggly and comfortable back in their native land(s).
<333 JANE

ps those are sideways hearts msn style (or facebook style) if you dont get it - havent been getting it aka mumma when i first did them!!!