I already forgot what I thought I would say but all I wanna do.....

Quick Aside To My Father: Guess The Song?

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So the Aurore situation is in a state of permanant nothingness, it's not great but we are happy when we do have good times and we hang out and have fun together. I am like a permanent moodswing because last time I blogged I was so extremely fachée and now I am all happy and cheery. Perhaps that is because I listened to my iPod while lying down at an upward slant in the empty pool counting all the planes that did not go in the direction of Canada? Or because I have 6 guests coming over to have fun and be fun with me on Saturday? Or because I'm going shopping in my three hour lunch tomorrow with Ceilidh and Kayla? Or because my teachers love me and time is flying and I only have 21 days left of school before I go home to Canada? Or because I'm going to Morocco? Or because I got the highest mark in the class on a French presentation (17/20) ? Anyhow, you get the picture, I am cheery and I have stuff to look forward too!!!!

Hoooboy.......

I have started my "diet" the seefood diet which really is making me quite rotund (joking mumma of course, well a little!!). But that's not really what I want to talk about. I am cheery because of a number of strange things and since I really want to tell someone and everyone thinks I'm strange if I do, I shall say them in this blog because then if you think I'm strange and you say that........nothing much that can be done for another two months!!!! Aaaaah, half done next Thursday!!!

Well, the first cheery Jane moment was last night at soccer when I got my license to play in the game next Saturday (OMG sooooooooooooo excited!!!) and we played in the rain and I played excellente and felt oh so high and mighty, not even coming home to cranky Aurore dampened my spirits. Secondly, I finally orgnaized my bedroom in France and looked through my steadily growing collection of souvenirs. In it, I realized that I have a lot of stuff to decorate (or rather add to the decoration on) my walls and that I keep collecting stuff, like this relatively cheap old posters and movie signs from the 20s and beyond which is going to make my room in canada so impossibly me and the anticipation is making me happy. Thirdly, I am just happy, I have settled into a good night time routine again, I am working on exercising, I am working on being friendly, eating well and doing all my Canadian homework and I am working on all the things I told my good friend in Canada Kay Dyson Tam I would. For instance, I saw and see France as a chance to transform myself into what I truly want to be and I am slowly but surely doing that (away from prying eyes was the goal) and that makes me immensely proud. Fourthly, I just reread my plane letters and my eyes swelled up a little but then I was happy and cheery and laughing again. Fifthly, I have found my groove.........sleeping, soccer, friends, school, Canadian homework, food, exercise. It is falling into place and I cannot even imagine a better moment of realisation. I am happy, the Canadian return things set into place, the anticipation, the Morocco in two weeks, holy moley, and the crazy things that are my everyday life!!! I am wonderful and can honestly say that for the first time, I mean I've been having fun and all but today was an honest to goodness break through and I have faith that I can make the rest just as good and when I fail, which I am bound to, I shall listen to my favourite songs and lean back in my chair and say screw it, I have le soleil and I have music and I have chickens and good food and nobody can take that away from me, atleast not for another six weeks and six days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love you all so very much!!!!!

Jane

ps thinking about youuuuuuuuuuuuuu

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DAD: I didn't really give you much,

it's Get Off by the Dandy Warhols,

listen to it, I do believe that it'll turn

your crank.......cannot believe I just said that!!!

My brain is hanging upside down

So I wrote the other post in the library while I waited a sad and long two hours for the train to come. I waited for one hour in the library and then another at the train station, sitting on the ground in between the passing trains and drawing faces with my sharpie (all of them half sad and half happy if you're interested) and making my face impassive and uninterested as a creepy old men winked and laughed and smoked and shouted unintelligable things at me, god, remind me to never sit for an hour outside of the train station!!!!
I am feeling better, although with A, not so much. She is being a pain, a lound shreaky computer hogging pain and we are rarely speaking. We acknowledge but it is a painful, you're a chore that I must continually do kind of acknowladgement, where does the good go? I am okay with that though, suprisingly, I have made plans with my amigas canadian and have plans almost for every single weekend until I leave and I have lots of energy to throw into homework, email, nice people at school, blogs and keeping myself in a polite, not distant, happy, cheery, thankful mood (when there are people around, on my own......).
Today I watched S21 a documentary about the Red Khmer, which I had never heard of but was interesting and brutal -quite like the holocaust. I didn't understand most of it but the Geo teacher was only too happy to help, she loves me, in the most annoying of ways. I came home today and dug up a story about a Lesbian who is rethinking her Lesbianninity (??) and is setting gay rights back in Georgia by a lot, for my news presentation in English class -in French- demain. Fun fun fun.....Afterwards I was about to go outside when Alix pulled me back in and said you have to stay inside and I said why and she said because I told Inès you couldn't play because you had a lot of work. The story behind that is once Inès (the six year old neighbour) came over to meet me and wound up being taught how to play rummy and now she annoyingly comes over every day and stays for hours requiring constant chatter and hanging off my shoulder until I want to hang....not in a good way. And so instead of playing with Inès all evening I got to be quiet and think about life and France and everything and the diet that I must start (not a rreall diet though) and also to reflect on how I left Canada five weeks ago and the inevitable thought that came to me being a previous two month exchanger (if I had only done the two month it would be half over now!!!!) God, I hate my brain.
I shall leave you now and go read my uber good book that my mommy sent me - thank god its long or it would already be over - and reflect about how much Canadian math I shall do tomorrow!!! God aint life a pain sometimes!!!
I love you all very much, I swear I don't just say it out of habit, three months in France and all I can think of is the people I love who are all snuggly and comfortable back in their native land(s).
<333 JANE

ps those are sideways hearts msn style (or facebook style) if you dont get it - havent been getting it aka mumma when i first did them!!!

A Strong Desire To Commit A Crime Worthy Of Death in The United States of America

So the last time I was in France on exchange I gorged myself on food in happy, oblivious bliss. This time I am less oblivious and lately I have been left (after chocolate, ice cream or a big meal) feeling bloated, gross and with a strong desire to feel healthy again (damn timing, I had just fallen into such a good routine before I left!!). So, I swear - by all of you reading this pathetic excuse for a blog paragraph - that I will be healthy by the time I come home!!!!
Now, onto more non-food oriented things. I am currently feeling a little low. I am writing this at school and I am feeling a strong desire to do something other than boring French classes. I want to move and shop (lame I know) and explore and take pictures and play hackey sack and catch with friends like I did at lunch today. I want to not look forward to solitude, endless hours of music and moments alone with my math textbook (again laaaame). It is starting to go a little bit south and although I am doing just fine (as our my relationships although Aurore and I have settled into hellos and goodbyes and mutual disdain) I am feeling the strain and hating some moments. I am, however, excited for Friday and the weekend and here are my reasons why:

1. The second package will be coming soon.
2. The weekend - duh.
3. I am going shopping around Isle Sur La Sorgue with Ceilidh.
4. Alex, Leo, Alex and Jenny are coming over to eat lunch and hang out.
5. It's April on Sunday. Which is such a morale booster, you wouldn't believe.

So, there is good. I also have started chugging away on my Canadian homework and as slow, monontonous and boring as it is I am having a decent time throwing myself into some work that makes me think without wanting to throw up - for example, in English class repeating the phrase 'I wish the government would help the tramsp' or 'It is a shame the government does not help the tramps' is driving me bananas, that and listening to the song 'In Paradise' by Phil Collins - Last night, was a catastrophy sleeping wise. My uncomfortable but doable sleeping arrangement was disrupted when I couldn't fall asleep until eleven and woke up every fifteen minutes between two am and six thirty am. Sleeping.......not my strong suit.

I now have a desire to go run with my iPod which I shall, at some point, do because a break from endless demands and corrections (this house is never quiet) would be nice for me and it would be a chance to clear my near-explosion head and give me a no language break. A blessing as I can't appear to speak either French nor English at just this moment. Writing.....whole different ball game.

So, mucho love to you all! See you in two months!!

Jane

ps - Marnie and Paul.......congrats on the new house!!!

Scouts de FRANCE ( in Fontvieille, Provence)

From Left: Super Suitcase, Super Toilet,

Super Love & Super Super

So, yesterday we went to Fontvieille to spent 24hours at Scouts of France, with atleast fifteen people having a crazy, stay up late, eat candy, party hard weekend. It started with lots of introductions, "bonjour je m'appelle Stanislaus, me (points to himself) Stan!!" and so on and so forth. "I speak badly English!" Then we went right away into our teams:

LES SUPER NULLE - Jeremie, Benoit, Alice & Marie

LE SUPER EQUIPE - Jane, Sylvia, Quentin, Stan & Genevieve

LE SUPER MOCHE (sorry can't spell) - Aurore, Simon, Morgane & Thomas

We rotated around the stations:

1. THE WORLD (all the continents are on different boards in a circle and they give you water balloons and a towel and between two people you put the water balloon on the towel and try and get the continents wet and you get points for getting it but if you're like my team you lose points because you continually get SUPER SUITCASE wet with your badly aimed waterballoons)
2. THE BLIND FOLD STATION (You and your group have to bind your ankles together and then go around trees and soccer balls and cars and then crawl and then do it all again blindfolded as well without touching the trees, cars, etc. and if your like my group and continually 'accidentally' untie your ankle binding things you get points off, oh yes, and you get points off if you continually touch trees and cars for guidance, which we also did!!)
3. THE GET ON THE MAT STATION (you have two mats placed together and SUPER LOVE tells you all the body parts that need to fit on the mat, ie one leg, one bad, two buts, one hand, three feet and between the five of you you need to accomplish this without any more or less and everyone needs to be on, this is the one station that my team was good at, unfortunately, so was every other team!!)

That evening we played a board game after our messy, campstyle dinner and it was pretty much come up with songs, make up dances and/or mime things for your team and the words were random things that had to do with the SUPERS, like 'constipated' for SUPER TOILET and 'love' for SUPER LOVE. We finally went to sleep after partying and singing and crap (videos will follow) at around 2 am and we woke up and had a nutella/baguette filled breakfast around ten before going to Mass because, unfortunately, SCOUTS is Catholic. Anyway, living through that we went and played out in the woods, all sorts of crazy games and then we played this weird stick game where everyone holds hands in a circle and there is a couple balanced sticks in the middle and if you seperate your hands you are disqualified and if you knock over the pile you are disqualified, I tied for first with Jeremie the first game and was knocked out first with Quentin in the second, but it was lots of fun.

I had a bit of trouble with a certain exchange partner who was a bit rude, distant and unwilling to help, 'you don't understand, you don't participate' kind of deal, which was annoying, but Stan was always willing to try his English and be very helpful while being very preppy yet goodlooking!!! :)

D'accord, I am now very tired from my long long long long long 24 hours and I'm going to go clean my room, do some homework and get ready for school tomorrow. It's a brand new week!!! Pictures will be up at somepoint and so will many more videos!!! Love you,

Jane

ps I have no religion, none whatsoever I have decided because I do not believe in a single thing that was said in that ceremony, although being together and singing and being part of something even if you don't necessarily believe in it is quite fun!!!

Le Mistral is going, going, going, going....never gone!!

Le Mistral, the name of the big wind here in Provence, is supposedly leaving us after giving us one week of hellish, Canada like coldness even though it is atleast 10° Celcius!!!!!

I am feeling better today you should all be glad to know, I have my package, I am content,I am about to take a shower and get clean and I feel positive, which is a lovely outlook on life. It's funny how one minute something feels overwhelming and the next it feels entirely do-able. Well, right now it all feels do-able and this afternoon I'm going camping with Scouts of France which should be...........interesting!!! We'll see.

Anyhow, pictures of school, Isle Sur La Sorgue, and all that jazz that have been accumulating for the past two weeks should be up tomorrow (I hope) and shortly following that the pictures (if theyre good) of Scouts should follow. Missing you all but of course throwing myself into endless homework demands from Canada, stupid projects from French teachers and my newest favourite song 'Get Off' by the Dandy Warhols, so I'm not doing too too badly!!! Je t'aime!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love,

Jane

ps I'm sorry I took the Aurore vid off but she's not really a video fan and also, a video of the chickens and a video from the music concert my music class held should be up soon!!!! A bientot!!

Hating moments. Feeling the one month strain.

So the last week has been absolutely great but it has been filled with little moments of anger, stress, sandness, etc. and it's been slowly mounting up and last night I was enjoying some downtime and just getting myself to feel better when Aurore, who was waching tv, said Jane can you set the table please? And I did but I was really mad because I've done it everyday this week without being asked and I need a minute to just veg and zone out to recuperate and she just doesn't seem to see what most people can see sometimes. Long story short I started to cry because I felt like shit (after I set the table) and Aurore got so worried then and was like Jane don't cry please don't cry and then she did something stupid (which I can't remember at all) and I started laughing and crying and it was a sight to see. I honestly feel the pressure mounting as I hit today, the one month mark and it takes longer and longer now to bring myself a happy place and my mood has been out of control, happy one minute and sad or angry the next. So, I am in retarded English level one on the computer and I am dying of computer boredom!!!! I am also feeling like I want the package that my mom sent me to come because here Emma is talking about a second package and the first one for me, that hasn't even arrived, is leaving me in tears (just last night) and making me all stressed out. Which is not good because the whole purpose of the package is to make me feel better and to give me a little piece of my home. And so I shall leave you know and go and enjoy my recess before I relearn all about Hitler (when she says it it sounds like éclair, yumm!!!) and World War Two in History class before going home and praying to god that the package has arrived. 29/30 days until Morocco (give or take!!) and 55 days until Canada!! I promise it's not me counting, its the Canadian who is sitting next to me.

A feeling blah Jane. <333

Dancing Queens

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsi8figfUtk

YESTERDAY WAS THE BEST DAY EVER!!!!! Not only did I meet a hot French guy who remembered my name!! (That is impossible!!!) But, I had an awesome bunch of classes, had fun playing basketball and had fun eating with Kayla, Jamie and Alex at lunch and talking about French stuff and Aurore and I took the train home together and had tons of fun and talked about everything and made 'French' plans for before I leave and when we came home she put on "That Don't Impress Me Much" and "Man I Feel Like A Woman" and Aurore, Alix and Sylvie went crazy dancing and it was a wonderful night. I shall upload chicken videos later, but for now, the link above is a combinations of the two songs and Aurore, Alix and Sylvie, but mostly Aurore, dancing and going nuts!!!